In 2007, this man pursued me and I resisted because I didn’t want to be another “notch” on his bed-post. He is very good-looking and I was nervous. He lives about 1500 miles away and whenever he came around–he travels for his job–he came to see me. He was very persistent and he seemed very sincere and genuine. It took about a year for me to give into his advances. Once I did, we were on cloud nine and we made time for each other, in spite of the distance. In 2010, I have NO IDEA what changed because he stopped communicating with me for 8 months. When he came back, he gave me a BS excuse about losing my business cards amongst all the managers and execs business cards and just recently found mine. Whatever. I didn’t buy it, but I was so happy to hear from him because I was going through a turbulent time and his phone call gave me some hope that he cared. He talked about how he wanted to take our relationship to the next level and he was telling me that his intentions were to spend more time with me and be open in communication. Well, since then, it has been the total opposite. He goes months without calling or seeing me and when he does see me, he “shuts down” as soon as we are “together”. It makes me feel like a whore. The last time I saw him was almost two months ago. I told him point blank that he is the only man that I’ve been with in alot of years, but the lack of communication is hurting me deeply. I told him that I’m not a robot and I need to know if he wants to be with me. He said, “why would you say something like that?” I had flown out to Colorado from Maryland to be with him while he was traveling for work. Well, the VERY NEXT day after telling me he wants to be with me, he blew me off to go to a party I wasn’t invited to. So, I went to the airport heartbroken. I was standing at my gate wondering why he’s been so up and down after knowing me all these years. I decided to find his gate and say “goodbye”. Two minutes after I found his airport gate, he came walking with a cell phone to his ear. He looked at me and I smiled and waved. He half-heartedly waved back and walked pass me and kept going to the other end of the airport. I waited for 30 minutes for him to come back. Finally, I went to board my plane back east. I haven’t heard from him since then and I have been extremely heart-broken and confused. Do you think that he will ever call again? Do you know why he seemed so sincere and now he’s so cold?

Creole femme

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You are so right. This is much harder and easier said than done. Reading this, it’s as if I’m meant to read this because I too, have to learn to let go. I love someone who I guess just isn’t right for me, or me for him. It isn’t us. We’re meant to be as we are, I’ve accepted him as he is and I can’t change me to suit him. And you’re quote, “should I put my needs aside so other people can be happy?” is why I had to leave. I guess I’m just ranting, but I realized I shouldn’t have to.

Good article. Thanks Deborah, I enjoyed reading it; my heart corresponds with it.

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