Bereavement Coping

coping with death of loved oneMourning the death of a loved one is a difficult time in anyone’s life. Coming to grips with loss and the reasons why this had to happen often is a true test of ones faith.

Going through the motions of death, autopsies, finding out the cause of death, obtaining death certificate, funeral and all the expenses to face doesn’t really give anyone the chance to set aside time to actually go through any form of bereavement.


So many friends and family rush to console but without understanding the cycle of life and acceptance of a life after death those words seem to fall on deaf ears.

As a psychic I have the ability to rationalize that death comes only to fulfill certain requirements in life.

All forms of passing fall within 3 categories.

1. To release pain

A long life or struggle with illness, death comes as a reprieve and reward.

2. To teach

Creating a learning experience for those left behind is a painful but purposeful ending to a life.

3.  To make others stronger

Some deaths look needless but to the survivors a death means that they have to carry on.

There are so many seemingly needless deaths that are at the root of worthwhile causes, outreaches, laws and charities.

A great example is The Adam Walsh Child Protection and Safety Act of 2006 or his fathers drive to create Americas most wanted after his child’s murder.

There are reasons for everything in life and believe it or not even death of a child.

The cycle of life tells us that even though a loved on is gone, their memory lives on in each and every person that they touched.

The ability to let go of them and see it as a transition to a better place less the trials and tribulations of life does more then free them of this earthly life but also lets us enjoy life guilt free and touch more people creating our own immortality.

“This is not your turn to die” seems to be a silly statement to make but to a survivor it is an emotional battle justifying their life while the passed loved one has left them behind.

I always said that the act of extreme grieving is a selfish act. You are not crying for them, but you are crying for yourself, your loss, not their misfortune, but your own.

Know that they will always be with you, they will always see and feel you, hear you words and in the silence alone you can also hear them and their ways to guild you.

I know you have heard this many times but it because the truth is forever, “you will see them again.”

Online Psychic Help – What to Expect

“Because psychics are capable of seeing the future, I just won’t drive that day.”

No really, some people do believe that they can call for psychic help and find out the winning lottery numbers, when they will have a bad day at work or a wreck on the way home.

Other people think that if they read their daily horoscope they can have a better handle on their day. (Just a thought but if you receive a general horoscope sent 6 thousand others, wouldn’t it be fair to say that the reading might be a bit general also?)

The truth? That is not exactly why people should get a online psychic or online horoscope. Telling your future is designed to help you deal with things upcoming not to save you from disaster.

Or as far as that goes foretelling the end of the world. (Really what good would it be if you knew it was coming?)

Think of going to a psychic like a helping hand. It’s not designed to pull you out of a hole in an absolute sense of word but rather a helping guide to guide you when you are feeling lost for direction / purpose.

Genuine psychics can guide a lost soul as they are usually more in tune with the elements and with their inner self thereby having more sense of clarity.

I do my best to console and redirect my clients from the things that will upheave their lives and remind them that everything happens for a reason, even the bad, (especially the bad).

All those hurdles form the foundation of latent strength, life experience and knowledge.

Even a car accident, even making that call to dui lawyers is a sad but necessary exercise for you to learn. Unfortunately winning the lottery has no real learning value and that is why winning the lottery is not one of the coveted 22 life lessons we talk about.

Accepting things you can not change and understanding that some things are just not meant for you to know, are in the 22.

If you are seeking psychic help, feel free to contact me.

Can I learn to be psychic?

Whether you believe you can only be born psychic or that everyone in the world has psychic powers, the fact is that the realm of paranormal and unnatural are everywhere & almost everyone can learn to be a psychic.

Believers in natural born psychics’ call them gifted and according to this flow of thought people are born already capable to perform psychic acts with little if any effort… OK only in super hero magazines people!

We all have to work at our craft whether you use clairvoyance / telepathy, cold reading, psychic reading, dream interpretation, palm reading, astrological reading and tarot card reading are just some of the abilities of a psychic.

We all have the capacity to connect into ability but not all have the desire to look past their world, their life and see what is beyond. And that is ok.  Some are thinkers and others are doers. There is no disgrace in either.

Many want to better be in touch with the unknown either for profit like psychic hotlines or for sole personal reasons. First educate yourself.

Here are some things to help you better connect to your psychic side. Tools to help you get started in psychic training:

Tarot cards: are tools of divination that create a rapport with the handler through messages and pictures telling of past, current and future events a person needs counseling on.

Numerology: points to numbers and calculations of birth to predict a person’s personality and life path.

Astrology and horoscopes: relies on the movement of planets and celestial bodies  using star signs and or zodiac signs to show a life map of when, where’s and why of future events.

Crystal Ball: Simply helps a clairvoyant concentrate on a subject instead of distractions around them when reading.

There are other ways to practice the skill of psychic ability and that is through meditations. Meditation is thought of as an eastern practice or new age, metaphysical, but do not disregard the Native American Indians sweat lodges as a form of controlling ones body to better control the mind.

Once you have felt you have connected with a psychic world, practice is a must and the best psychic ability test is your friends and family

Relax and play with your style all else will fall into place. It is all a matter of time. Trust yourself and the words that come out of your mouth. Think of it like channeling the message that need be.

Best psychic tool is your self confidence !

What is Love

what is love

You know that fuzzy feeling between being awake and falling asleep.. that feeling of just being so comfortable and letting go? The knowledge that nothing bad will happen and trust you will awake tomorrow. That is love.

I know you are confused. Falling in love is this dramatic firework being shot off in your heart, or the excited beat of your heart when you see that person.

Actually…. No it is not; those feelings can be brought about with a scary movie or too much coffee. Trust me when all the fireworks fade and that heavy heart beat slows what you will wish you had was warmth of trust and comfort that true love brings.

Romantic love has its place and no one should deny that the flutter of eye lashes and shaking hands are not signs of what will come; but understand that when you date someone and you have those feelings it doesn’t mean that at that moment you are in love, rather you are in-love with the possibility of love.

It is what inspires love poems, love songs and it is what fuels the dating sites like match or chemistry or the alike.

Love for a mate should be interchangeable with a Friendship love, the fact that sex is healthy in a relationship is a given.

It gives a couple the closeness and shared pleasure that create trust and bond, but true love should never be based on sex. Relationships that run solely on sexual needs and romance fade over time while those that rely on companionship last for the long hall.

Last but not least you know it is love when it hurts. Love hurts, not just feeling failure or damage done to pride, but a pain that only comes from a lose like death.

Most of the time younger people mistake anger for this mourning, but anger is more of a selfish feeling that comes with admitting you lost a game or feelings of ego.

When you are truly in love with someone you do not want to say good bye because they have become part of you and compliment the person you have become.

Not knowing what love is about is what many in life face, wondering why they have been divorced 3 times, why no mater how hard they try and pick through perspectives like interviewing for a high paying job and still the relationships go awry.

It is discouraging and depressing. But you will not know 100% by the way a person looks, their birthday, or education if they are right for you and a good match.

Love is blind to qualifications and until you feel that warm comfortable trust that doesn’t make your heart beat fast but rather slows it, you will not have felt love.


Love Spells that Work

casting love spells

Wanna learn the do it yourself love spells that work?

Warning: the effects given by these love spells are intense, so think wisely who you pick for casting love spells on,  (find out if they are married, psychotic, or a shim) for their attraction to you is irreversible.

Magic love spells are not solely mystically based and the reality is that most witchcraft is only considered mystic because of the lack of understanding the world has.

Even the practitioners them selves do not truly understand the how it works. Rather they say it is all the “spirits”.  Most do have scientific answers unproven “yet”

A look at the psychology behind a powerful love spells:

An individual loves what makes them feel good and in some cases becomes addicted to a feeling brought on by the effects. Drugs for instance is used to create a feeling of euphoria, it makes you happy, makes you feel good, copies a feeling of love.

A person is drawn to be with someone that makes them feel good and all you have to do is be there when they experience that feeling and the trigger is associated to you.

So let’s look at the scientific method:

Pheromones  are released when a person is sexually aroused. These pheromones have been attempted to be manufactured by cologne companies and some claim to say they have been successfully reproduced. you can add to this effect by using a pleasant comforting perfume (vanilla, cinnamon or sweet perfumes)

When you are sexually aroused the smell is detectable by the opposite sex subconsciously but still detected causing their body to react, equaling a sense of arousal. “That happy feeling” is associated with you.

Optical triggers also are detected, the flip of the hair or a blink or a stare at the right time is given without you even noticing that you are throwing them out, but they are very well received. Same with the tone change in your voice.

Now back to casting love spells:

attracting loveWhile talking with the person targeted, you need to have control of your ability to release the sexual pheromone and no matter how hard you try to control your efforts, just thinking a person is attractive is not enough.

Picture yourself in an arousing act of a sexual nature (use your imagination) do no drool but you get the idea. You are aroused, pheromones fly, voice changes, physical mannerisms and they react.

Some react right away others have a delayed reaction or need multiple chances to have long hard in-depth conversations with you. Just have fun with it and be prepared for real results.

If you need some love spells white magic help from a professional, feel free to contact me.

For full tarot readings from me personally just click on psychic readings in the top tab

Cheating Spouse Signs and How to Catch a Cheating Husband or Wife

catch cheating spouseNumber one topic asked to psychics has to do with love. I guess because that seems to be one of the few things that individual’s feel they have no control over.

I am often asked to read someone’s cards and they wish to know if their husband or wife or partner is cheating. As much as I would like to dash their fears more times than not the cards will say yes they are.

Why? “ Because you asked”. Confused? Let me explain.

When an individual comes to me and asks if their spouse is cheating, they already had questions in their mind to begin with. They saw the signs of an affair; they knew even subconsciously that it was happening.

We all have a sixth sense, some stronger than others and even more important some have the experience of knowing what that “feeling” is when sometime isn’t quiet right.

The knowledge of knowing when is a good time to listen to the sixth sense or intuition and following that gut instinct is the difference between a fearless leader and a follower.

My advice is given as a reminder that even though they feel something is happening it is not always so, but most of the reason you come to me is not to actually know whether your spouse is cheating but to get a kind of proof and way to tell yourself you are not crazy.

And although the cards may say yes, they are being cheated on, and may even go into detail as to how long I have been cheated on.

The real test begins with – How do I catch a cheating husband or a cheating wife? It used to be that adultery was against the law in the US, now it is only in New York and then it has to be admitted or proven through pictures or video.

No the real thing broken in infidelity is not the law but trust and for most people that crime is worth punishing.

I suggest to some of my clients signs of an affair. Here are a few:get proof of cheating partner

  • Do they look you in the eye anymore? (Embarrassed of their behavior and feel ashamed)
  • Do they stay out longer then usual? (Depending on the time either actually cheating or making calls to the other)
  • Doesn’t leave cell phone out to be looked at? Has it on vibrate or off when home? (So you can not see the calls coming in or read out going calls)
  • Nothing seems to get done around the house when left home alone? (Perhaps not really staying home)
  • Secretive of e-mail ID and password, closes computer when you walk up? (Talking with the other)
  • Do they go through a cycle of arguments, usually argues right before weekend or before going out with friends? (For them to justify undesirable behavior)
  • Do they wear cologne to go to the hardware store? (Don’t laugh it does happen)
  • Bath almost as soon as coming home, or decide to do laundry?

“Now, for the fun part.”  Let me help you get that proof of infidelity, but before we begin, make sure you know what you will do when you do get what you are looking for.

  • *Buy a cell phone just like your spouses and open the battery, with a screw driver or knife break one of the battery wires the attach to the inter workings of the phone. Dead phone that will have no charge can not be used. You keep their phone safe and note all incoming calls for a day. They get the broken phone, thinking they will charge it later.
  • *Phone taps can be bought at any radio shack along with a tape recorder that plugs into your land line phone andstarts to record only when the phone is in use. Heck there is even good software that does the job for you.
  • *Redial on the phone after being gone all day
  • *While your spouse is on the computer do something to create a controlled emergency so that the computer is left without being closed. Unscrew a water line under a sink, burn food and make fire alarm go off, you get the idea.
  • *Change cars with a friend and follow your spouse. Wear a hat.
  • *Don’t get in trouble at work but call home more often but make sure you have thought of good questions to ask also good for calling them at work too.
  • *Ask for a day off or say you are going to be gone all day then return home to get something or stop in to say you missed them.

Remember that all of these are good ways to catch a cheating husband or cheating girlfriend but ask yourself what if this is all in your mind; be sure YOU are not caught.

HERE IS AN ADDED BONUS I was told by one of my clients  a trick that worked GREAT for them. In amazon a transmitter collar which is the smallest device I have found so far it can be detached from the collar and sewn into a favorite coat or under the mat of a car and never be noticed. greatest way to track your love and see where they are going! I linked the word BONUS for your convenience so click and buy.

Psychic Readings by Phone, Chat, Email

Tarot Cards Readings by Phone, Chat, Email

Psychic Readings


Here is one of my videos on Youtube… enjoy

Training To Be Psychic

psychic training developmentSome people would like to say that being psychic is something that you must be born with or that it runs in an individual’s family, some even say that psychic talent can be obtained through near death experience.

Although there are some exceptions to the rule, a psychic gift is really a little less of a gift and more of a trained talent.

There is no such thing as a person that has never touched a piano just sitting at one in an afternoon and being a concert pianist.  And although a person may have an ear for music,  it takes practice and determination to achieve greatness. Psychic abilities are no different.

Everyone knows how to play checkers and some can remember the moves and intricacies of chess. A few are capable of competing in chess tournaments or consider them chess masters.

Atari had made a 3D version of chess that allows the player to involve 3 levels of boards that gave access to all the 3 levels at once.

The human brain works like a chess board, allowing movement, wins and losses on a single level,  occasionally letting some be worthy of competition and others true masters.

But the persons that can see beyond the single board and play on multiple levels has more brain function working all at once.

The true psychic ability comes from a part of the brain that does puzzles, conducts mathematical equations.

It is also what allows a woman a better sense of recognizing others emotions (woman’s six sense) and gives a person a feeling of empathy for others. These are the sections of the brain that can be trained and manipulated to exercise more often and become stronger.

If I know 1+1=2 then you can also with time recognize an eye blink at a given time is a lie. You can know that a change of weather can be first predicted by stiffness in a knee or that more suicides happen around holidays.

It is true that those things are not psychic, but scientific in nature. Now take those inner knowledges times 500 and a person can subconsciously predict the future. Much like a super computer can take information on a given subject and predict an out come.

If a person that has already become stronger psychically is introduced to thought past this level, added to a more spiritual connection, then the efforts are more channeled like sun-light through a magnified glass.

Things needed in psychic training: book on tarot cards, or favorite ability, and this time actually read it (you have to want to learn things of spirit to talk about things of spirit), puzzle that you will put together upside down (nothing but you, your thoughts and a pictureless puzzle connects you to the subconcious), time to go in groups of people to watch them communicate….. you stay silent and just observe, quiet time set aside for meditation, and time to listen to your thoughts away from TV or Radio.  (I call electronic entertainment mindless noise or time of empty thought, much like candy bars being empty calories.)

Sounds simple but these are the only things needed to become psychic.

Have you ever tried your hand at psychic training? If you need professional expertise, feel free to contact me.

Love Again How to start Over

starting over again in love and life

If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Period.

….So you think life is not fair and everything you have tried to succeed at has failed ?

Perhaps your marriage has failed, lost your job, or maybe the problem is not a loss at all but that you have not really obtained anything to loose. Life sucks!

Many people get depressed when things go wrong; they turn to counseling or medication. I had tried my share of counseling and medicines.

One thing that I found out about both is neither makes your life better, it just changes your way of looking at a bad situation. And sometimes that is all people really need but that does only work for a few.

What about those lives that should not be veiled or looked through with rose color glasses. Sometime acceptance is not the best course.

For me it was an epiphany. After years of counseling and some tries at medication I had faced a realization that I either had to change my life or deal with a life in hell.

I had a cheating spouse that had posed as a helpless sex addict, a victim of his own disease. But what did that make me if he was the victim? (I was stupid) trying to change the unchangeable, council the unwilling.

I had woke up one morning and just decided that no amount of medication was going to make me love again or happy to be with a man that could never be faithful. And no amount of counseling is going to make me see that my life is perfect.

The only way I was going to be happy with my life is if my life was something worth being happy with.

How to start over is as simple as enrolling in class one week, getting a job the next, having a few paychecks under your belt, grabbing a bag of personal items and leaving.

I did and I slept like a baby. Never once did I regret taking charge of my life again. Never once did I wonder would I or my children do better if I hadn’t changed my life.

Life after divorce isn’t easy and I will never tell a person to take the decision lightly but in some cases the question has to be asked. Is it better for my family to stay together or for me to be dead?

It’s all about taking this information and making it work for you.
This is your life no one has to live it but you.

It’s not the end if your life is undesirable and maybe it isn’t really bad enough to quit your job, putting all your efforts behind finding a satisfying job.

Or putting everything aside to pursue getting a degree. The grass is sometimes greener on the other side but if you truly do feel that life is not all it could be, you have only yourself to blame and change begins the day you wake up and realize nothing will fix its self.

There is only one thing more embarrassing then a 50 year old non-traditional student or a person finding them selves back on the dating scene trying to find love. That’s a person that has given up on happiness.

Nothing is impossible!

Getting off welfare, getting a life, going back to school, getting a job that you enjoy or finding love again need only first be dreamt then make a set of plans to achieve.

How did you manage to start over? Comments welcome!

and for more help try Personal Growth from

How can I tell if I am psychic?


Being psychic is actually not as easy as you would think even though there are definite guild lines to go by to achieve a sense of oneness with ones surroundings, and really that is all it takes.
To be aware of the people, places, things and sources of energies that makes the world move.

Start by asking yourself these questions

1. Am I a religious person? Do I have a good commentary with God?

2. Do your friends and family see you as a person that they can go to for advice or venting?

3. Do you feel comfortable listening to others problems? And do you often feel like if you were in that situation you would do things differently?

4. When things happen do you have a sense of peace while others are sucked into the emotions of the moment?

5. When you were a child, did you ever have thoughts of great purpose?

6. Do you often day dream of things that haven’t happened?

7. Have you had invisible friends as a child?

8. Have you ever heard voices? Or asked your self a question only to answer also?

9. When you close your eyes do the pictures in your mind seem to come true? Or disavow?

10. And do you often say the same thing as friend at the same time? Or think of a person and they soon call?

These are just a few of the tail tell signs of psychic ability.

Finding Online Psychic – Essential Guildlines to Prevent a RipOff

Feeling lost for direction and thinking where can I find an on-line psychic?

Well they are everywhere but a simple word search will not insure that the medium you find will be a good example of the psychic community.

In truth a lot of the businesses advertising psychic readings, tarot, and fortune telling are merely selling you “the emperor’s new cloths”

Guild lines to finding a good online psychic :

1. You need to pull back the curtain on the wizard of Oz and see them in a real light. Ask for real names, Google the name. Ask questions !

2. Do not be sucked in by flattery, or sugar coating. Sales are their job and you are often just a paycheck. If it appears to be too good to be true, it is.

3. Be willing to see a reading as entertainment at first. Never spend more then you would on a night out. If the reading is correct and you wish to return to the same psychic make sure and note their name and extension and do not be afraid to tell the reader that they did a good job.

4. One of the things that is the tell tail sign of a fraud is mentioning curses… To many so called psychics will tell you that you have a curse as the reason for troubles or difficulties and if ever you want to have a normal life you must pay $500 sometimes $5,000 and people pay this money. At the first mention of “curses” walk away. THERE ARE NO CURSES that can placed upon you….

It is true that there are a lot of individuals that do a great job and are a real asset to the psychic world. Many are extraordinary, but it is “the bad apples” that makes the barrel stink and I have little sympathy for frauds.

There is little that the psychic community can do, so please watch out for the wolves.

See me explaining this and more on my youtube tutorials and vlogs deborahpsychic subcribe and friend me

What’s YOUR experience of psychic reading ? Feel free to contact me if you want to experience the difference !